Blogger: James Ryan Irion

            …Beauty is more than skin deep.  Now I'm not a wise old man who knows everything, but I have seen and heard a lot over the years.  So many times have I heard women, who say their hair looks lousy, they forgot their makeup, their outfit is mismatched, their hair roots are showing, or just a general dissatisfaction with their appearance and body that it's hard for me to ignore sometimes.  For some women this discomfort is just an occasional thing, like a bad hair day.  But for others it's a recurring issue and one that I feel deserves some attention and support.  Now I realize how thin this red line is that I am about to walk and that some of what I will say can apply to more than just women in their late teens or twenties.  I have chosen this young age group specifically because of how susceptible and vulnerable they can be.  So this is just my way of brightening your day and trying to promote natural beauty over chemically covered up skin.

            Maybe I'm just a simpleton or more of a nice guy when it comes to women.  Or maybe it's because of the fact that I just haven't caught the eye of many women yet in my life and have been forced to do it alone.  Whatever the reason, over the last several years I have begun to see women in a different light.  More like an honest and realistic perspective that values natural beauty over makeup and outfits.  I've even "broadened my horizons" as far as what I am physically attracted to about women.  But I think the issue goes deeper than the skin for some and has more to do with self confidence and psychology.  A friend once told me, "You have to like yourself before others will learn to like you."  When I used to have depression, I liked most everyone else but hated myself and so I was never happy with how I looked.  I can't say I am 100% happy with how I look now mostly because of my level of fitness.  But over time, I gradually accepted my appearance and have become more and more at peace with how I look. 

            Basing your self confidence upon others liking you is an unsafe practice too; just as I used to gauge my self esteem on whether women were attracted to me or not.  Back in high school, most women rejected me on the basis that they weren't attracted to me and so my self esteem suffered.  Over time, I have gradually learned to be comfortable with my physical and superficial appearances and to keep things as basic as possible.  Yes I mousse my hair only because I would look like a mad scientist if I didn't.  But I have realized it takes self respect to achieve self confidence.  Especially for those younger women who are not "model" skinny and wishy washy about your weight or not with the "in" crowd. Who cares?  I've found women more and more attractive if they have some meat on their bones, so to speak, if you want to go down that road.  Even more attractive is a friendly, talkative, funny personality that makes knowing the woman so gratifying.  No matter who you are, just be yourself and find that inner sunshine.  Strong self confidence has its benefits.  Being confident in yourself and your looks is a strong foundation that can lead to better things.  And don't forget to smile more too because it works wonders, believe me.  It's healthy for the mind and doesn't hurt the environment.

            For those younger women who are fairly confident about their looks, but pile on the makeup, this part is especially for you.  Eyeliner, lipstick, mascara, blush, skin foundations, eyelash curlers, umpteen shades of hair dye, nail and toe nail polish of as many colors and more chemicals, eye shadow, lip plumpers, lip gloss, and probably a few others I forgot to list - my apologies.  Not every woman piles on the makeup I'm sure.  But I have had ex girlfriends who would never let me see them without makeup on - even to the point of being quite stubborn.  What happened to appreciating a woman's natural beauty?  I mean sure for certain occasions such as weddings and job interviews makeup should be applied to look professional.  But it's not life threatening if you messed up your hair, wore little or no makeup, dyed your hair so long ago that your roots are showing.  Be proud of what you look like when you get out of bed.  Even after fixing up your hair and applying a little makeup, don't deny the beauty that you have because you had to use the makeup.

            Many younger women that I have known over the last ten years seriously didn't think they were attractive, when they absolutely were.  For example, recently I had a friend and classmate say she felt lousy because her hair was a mess.  Then she went on to say that women who resembled her physically were probably worth a dime a dozen.  I seriously doubt that.  Even if there are women who physically resemble your body type, never forget what you have inside because that makes each woman very special and exceptional.  You might not hear that you're special, sexy, or sweet from everyone that matters to you, but that doesn't mean those qualities aren't there.  Take the best personality traits you have, smile, and use them to shine as a person and the rest will fall into place.

            Each young woman is a diamond in the rough of today's ruthlessly critical society and each deserves a big pat on the back just for looking the way they look and trying to be resilient in the face of adversity.  So I ask you to take an extra second and smile at the image in the mirror, brush aside those rude criticisms from others, dig deep down and grab that glimmer of strength - whether you are mostly or scarcely self confident.  I may sound like the world's biggest suck up by posting this blog, but a lot of what I've said here is true.  Hopefully this blog gives some younger women a boost in their day and helps others to believe in themselves, before piling on the makeup.  Have confidence in yourself and good things will happen with time.